This should be the title of the final Season 8 episode of Game of thrones.
Seven and a half years of a badass mother of dragons putting together the biggest, meanest army in the world and she lets her guard down for love and dies. I guess it’s just like a woman, right? She knew that Jon Snow was borderline traitor, but jeez, what a guy. And so an entire ten years of character development goes belly up in one pathetic scene.
But narrative brain death doesn’t stop there. Her murderer, legally, by blood, can simply wave his hand and say, “Hey guys…it’s me…I’m the winner here. I’m the true Targaryan heir to the Iron Throne, not this stupid B-I-T-C-H!” at any time in the last few episodes, but no, he has to do this the uncool way of a complete moron. He ends up a total loser, back at the Night’s watch, an organization which has no purpose any longer since there are no more White Walkers to watch. Why even bother with a storyline about genetics when it makes no difference in the meta?
Most puzzling of all, when all the mucky mucks are sitting around picking a new king, there’s Robert Baratheon’s son, whom Cersei Lanister wanted dead on account of him being the rightful king, completely ignored. Good-bye, season one!
Finally, as the episode draws to its mind numbing end, all the fascinating machinations characterizing prior years have sloughed off leaving a strange new world which reveals a sitcom with characters sitting around a table bantering gleefully back and forth about feeding the peasants. The dragon has flown the coop along with its dead mother, Arya stark has left not only Westeros, but all her ninja powers behind, the red witch is dead and the White Walkers no longer exist. Magic gone, the world has become safe for levity. Wow.
This reminds me so much of the progression of an actual sitcom, Malcolm in the Middle. The original premise had Malcolm as a boy genius coping with and idiot family. By the time of the final episode, Malcolm had become an idiot, too.
To add a little extra added stupidity, Bran Stark becomes King of almost everything. Bran? In previous episodes, he’s had the unique capacity of checking out mentally when danger approaches. In fact, it’s kind of this “thing”. While Hodar is holding the door, Bran is cavorting with the three eyed raven of his dreams. When the White King approaches, Theon holds the White Walkers back while Bran has his eyes rolled back in his head. Just the kind of guy you need in a crisis. But of course, now that the entire show has turned sitcom, maybe this premise will be good for a few laughs.
And that’s it. The end of Game of Thrones tied up neatly in a big bow of “Holy Cow, who ARE these people?”
Roll End credits over the voice of Neil Innes:
How Sweet to be an Idiot,
And dip my brain in joy,
Children laughing at my back,
with no fear of an attack,
As much retaliation as a Toy.
How sweet to be an idiot, how sweet.